Sweetheart
by bunsintheoven
Summary: Katniss wants Peeta in a way she does not understand.  Before epilogue.
1. Relapse

**-I tremendously apologize for my grammar and my poor vocabulary, as you'll notice, english is not my native language, so.. sorry about that folks!-**

I open my eyes as the sunlight comes dancing through my window, I turn myself to my right to make sure I wasn't dreaming, to make sure everything was really okay… to make sure my Peeta was still there, sleeping next to me. I touch his cheek lightly, trying so hard not to wake him up but then he puts his hand on my cheek as well, opening his beautiful blue eyes.

"Hey" he says, with that morning voice of his I love so much "good morning Katniss" he pulls me closer with his free hand and kisses me on the nose.

"Morning Peeta" I reply with a smile, yes a smile, it's hard to think I would smile again after all the things we went through, but having him makes everything much better, waking up next to him every morning makes me realize that it's over, the war, the games, the pain. It is really over. And of course I will never forget what happened; it just won't hurt anymore.

I give Peeta a peck on the lips and get out of bed to take a shower. After it, I walk in the bedroom wrapped with just a towel, because all of my clothing is there, it surprises me that Peeta's still in bed, he always gets up when I shower to bake some bread for breakfast.

"Peeta, is everything ok?" I ask while I open my wardrobe to take some clothes, nothing special, just a pair of pants and a simple t-shirt.

He doesn't answer. I turn around to face him and ask again.

"Peeta, I asked if you were o-"

"Stay away from me!" he screams and I don't know what is happening. I take a few steps in his direction, trying to figure out why he's acting like this, is it possible?

"Peeta wh-"

"STAY AWAY! YOU'RE A MONSTER!" his words confirm what I was thinking, hijacking, it all takes me back to the moment I stood in front of him and he tried to kill me. Of course he hasn't been hijacked this time, but he's having a relapse. What do I do now? I look at him and he's there, lying on our bed with his hands on his head and his eyes tightly closed, fighting to stay with me and I'm here standing in front of him, doing nothing, just being wrapped by nothing but a towel and scared, I don't want to lose him again, no, I won't.

"PEETA, LOOK AT ME ME!" I approach to the bed and I get on top of him, holding his wrists against the bed with my hands "LOOK AT ME!" I bend closer to his body, my chest on his chest and I can easily feel his heart pounding faster and faster, my face is inches away from his when he opens his eyes, blue eyes full of pain, fear and puzzlement. "Peeta it's me, Katniss! Stay with me!"

"MONSTER!" he shouts angrily at me, as if he never felt something but hate towards me. Looking at me was the man I was so afraid of, not the one I was in love with. Not my Peeta. He closes his eyes again and tries to get me off of him but I held on to his wrists until he was there lying steady on our bed again, clasping his hands, fighting himself.

"Peeta open your eyes, look at me! I'm Katniss, your Katniss!" as I spit those words I see he's not clasping his hands any longer and his eyes slowly begin to open, pain remaining on them as tears come streaming down his cheeks.

"I can't!" he says with a painful pitch

"Yes you can! Stay with me Peeta, like you said you would!" I replied with desperation. I bend over to kiss him, my hands went from his wrists to his chest as he lies his hands on my hips "Stay with me…" I whisper before we break the kiss and he looks at me, with those blue eyes I know so well.

"A-a-always" he tells me.

"Are you okay?" I ask fearfully.

"Yes, Katniss… I'm so-"

"It's okay, Peeta, I understand…" I was wrong, I will never understand how it feels like to be hijacked, how it feels to being disgusted by the ones you love the most or how it is to lose yourself. But I really try to understand, it's not his fault, it will never be, it will always be mine, because if it wasn't for my love to him they would've never hurt him in the first place.

"Don't cry, I'm back and I will stay with you" he speaks these words as he wipes away my tears, tears I didn't know I had. I feel his hands running all over my naked torso, when I noticed that my towel was missing and that I was completely naked I blushed and Peeta realized about it.

"it's ok" he blushed as well, still looking directly in my eyes, he smirked and I looked down, ashamed. He covered my naked body with a blanket next to us then he rolled me over to be on top of me, grabbed my face with one hand as he put a lock of hair behind my ear with the other.

"You might be a monster, but you're a beautiful one and the one I love" he joked, I just half-smiled, how is it that he can make jokes out of such bad situations? He could tell that for me it wasn't funny "Bad joke huh? Well that's why I'm a baker" he kissed me softly on the cheek "Everything's fine Kat, stop worrying, I said I would stay with you forever and that's what I will do. Trust me." He said as he got up "I will be downstairs baking some bread for breakfast, I'll let you get dressed" before leaving he stroked my face and kissed my forehead.

As I got dressed I was thinking of the feeling Peeta's cold hands had on me earlier when he touched my naked skin, it was nice, so new, so... pleasant. I started to think of his naked body and me leaving sweet kisses all over it, letting us fall into lust, making love... when I came back to reality I looked at myself in the mirror, my cheeks were flushed and hotter than usual, I washed off all thoughts of Peeta naked and went downstairs to eat breakfast with him.

"Finally!" he put 2 plates on the table filled with scrambled eggs and some right-out-of-the-oven bread, I sat there, in front of him, looking at him with a smile on my face as I looked my Peeta, he was back. "What?" he looked at me mumbling with food on his mouth "why are you blushed?" he swallowed.

"Me? oh no, it's nothing!" I felt embarrassed if he only knew I blushed because of him, thinking of us making love.

We ate breakfast and went upstairs, he decided he would take a shower as I was lying on the bed. I closed my eyes and I had this sort of dream, where Peeta and I were on the cave, the one we stayed at on the 1st games, our naked bodies colliding, drowned by a heavy wave of pleasure mixed with lust and love... I opened my eyes and Peeta was naked right in front of me coming out of the bathroom, as he realized I was staring at him he took the closest thing to him, which happened to be a book, to cover himself, then he laughed.

"I'm sorry, I assumed you were sleeping" he laughed again because I closed my eyes to avoid his naked figure "You're so innocent Katniss"

"What?" I asked him with a bitter pitch. Eyes still closed.

"Yeah, what you heard, you get uncomfortable so easily by nudity, it's actually really cute" he spoke "You can look now, he had his pants on; him being shirtless was fine but nudity does make me uncomfortable. I opened my eyes and he was sitting at the edge of the bed facing the window that was in front of us, putting on his shoes and letting me appreciate his shapely back and his muscled arms, I wanted to jump on him and kiss his back and arms but the thought of what he'd say kept me lying on bed, just watching.

"So?" says Peeta as he stands up to put on his shirt and uses his fingers as a comb running them through his hair "what are we going to do today, sweetheart?" he looks at me and smiles.

"I don't know, what do you feel like doing, sweetheart?" I tell him emphasizing the last word with a poor imitation of Haymitch's drunken voice. We both laughed at my failed attempt of mimic our mentor.

"And that's why you're a hunter, you'd starve to death if you lived out of your mimic skills" he says, and it's true, I don't have any talents besides hunting, although Peeta says I'm a good singer, but I know he says that because he loves me, not because it's true.

He approaches and puts himself on top of me "but I don't care if your mimic skills suck, I'll love you no matter what" then he leaves a gently kiss on my lips and by the time he was about to get up I grabbed his shirt pulling his warm body back against mine and he smirks at me, kissing me once again but this time his kiss is more passionate and my hands are tangled in his blond, curly hair, the taste of his lips is heavenly, I can feel his heart, his bare love in every kiss he gives me, at first it made me feel uncomfortable because I wanted him to feel the same, but I was not sure if I could put my love for him in just one kiss but I decided to try, I decided to let go, and I kissed him back with everything I had, thinking of us, of how much I love him, how I don't ever want to be far from him, apparently he felt it his grip on me became tighter and he broke the kiss for a few seconds "I love you Katniss" he told me on a soft, sweet voice, barely breathing.

"I love you too Peeta" I replied and kissed him softly.

*****_I will continue the story within a few days, I want to wait until I have some reviews on my work to improve a bit on my writing, so please leave your reviews, thank you so much, May the odds be ever in your favor!_


	2. The door's open

So here's the 2nd chapter guys, so sorry if it's not that long/good as the 1st one, I've been really busy, hope you like it!

**Peeta's P.O.V.**

I wake up and find myself lying in bed next to Katniss, oh Katniss you still don't know the effect you can have on me and to be honest, I don't know either. I wish I could just stop time and appreciate her beauty, she looks beautiful when she sleeps... and when she hunts.. or when she smiles.. even when she's angry, she's beautiful in every possible way and she's mine, finally all mine. _After all this time_.

I stroke her hair as she sleeps deeply "I love you" I whisper.

"I love you too" a soft, sleepy voice replies to my whispers. I guess she was not sleeping as deeply as I thought.

"Good morning" I say and I softly place a kiss on her cheek.

She smiles "Good morning" she turns herself to see my face and kisses me passionately. She dreamed about me. Whenever she kisses me like this in the morning is because she had a dream, a good one and I was involved.

I love it when she dreams about me, it makes me feel loved, I know she loves me but I won't deny that sometimes I can't believe all of this is real, I suppose I'm afraid. Afraid of her telling me how she's just acting for the Capitol, even now that the war is over. Some days I wake up and I forget that there's not a Capitol to control me, I forget that I'm free and I forget that I'm not a piece in their twisted games, even though I won't be the Peeta Mellark I was before the games and that I will always be doubtful about many things on my past, they won't control me ever again.

"Peeta?" Katniss's beautiful voice breaks the yarn of my thoughts as she strokes my chest up and down bringing warmth to my body.

"Yes, love?" I gently reply.

She opens her mouth but nothing comes out, she seems to be overthinking what she wants to say "Can I ask you something?" she speaks doubtfully.

"Of course you can!" I tell her.

"W-w- do- I-" she's stuttering, just as if she doesn't know how to ask "go on!" I look her in the eyes giving her an encouragement look.

"Do you want me?" she blushes as soon as she spits the words and looks away biting her lower lip.

"What are you saying Katniss? Of course I do!" I take her by the chin, turn her head so she'll be facing mine then I kiss her "I want you." I say firmly.

She half-smiles and speaks again "No, you don't understand... I mean... my b-body... s-se-"

"Sexually?" I ask.

"Y-yes" She's flushed agin, looking away even when my hand is holding her chin. I remain speechless and then I just burst out laughing.

"Why are you laughing Mellark? If you don't find me attractive in that way you can just say it, ok?" she mumbles and a pitch of anger paints her words.

"Oh, now I'm Mellark, I'm not Peeta, interesting." I joke "Everdeen, don't be silly, I want you in every way that's possible, even sexually, I just never thought you'd be ready for it, you know? we would have to be undressed and since you get uncomfortable with nudity I thought y-"

"I want you" She demands fiercely.

"Here I am, come and get me Mockingjay" I wink and she hits me on the chest with the hand.

"I hate you" Katniss looks at me defiantly and gets out of the bed, walking angrily to the first floor.

Katniss's P.O.V.

Peeta Mellark, you jerk, I'm not innocent, I'm a grown up woman who is perfectly comfortable with nudity. Well I'm not but I hate the idea of Peeta thinking of me as innocent, I want him to think of me as a woman, a woman who can make love to him every simgle day if that's what it takes to make him happy and satisfied, because that's what I want, I want to make him _happy_. I'm ready. I hear Peeta's coming downstairs, I decide to sit on the livingroom and try to ignore him.

"Katniss?" I want to desperately throw myself in her arms but I try my best to stay sitting there ignoring him "Katniss come on! You can't be mad at me forever! Why are you mad? I laughed, that's it!"

"You think I'm innocent, don't you?" I say overacting the words.

"Well, you are, there's nothing wrong with that, sweetheart" he sits next to me putting his arms around me.

"You need a woman, not an innocent kid..." I mumble as I look down to my knees.

"What? no! If I wanted a woman I would have left you ages ago but here I am, am I not?_ I want** you**, Katniss_, I don't care if you're innocent or if you're not, I don't have a care in the world as long as I'm with you, ok?" he kisses me on the head. I face him and kiss him softly on the lips.

He kisses me back and I just can't handle it, the images of us making love pop into my mind, I'm doing it, right here, right now. I want him. I kiss him again but this time the kiss is more passionate, our tongues get involved, his warm lips against mine and his taste is heavenly, I jump onto his lap and put one hand on his chest while the other one is tangled up on his golden curls. He puts his hands on my hips and a shiver runs through my spine, pleasure. As our tongues keep fighting inside each other's mouth and our breathing becomes heavier I puy my hand inside his shirt so now my fingers are running up and down his bare chest, he breaks up the kiss "what are you doing, Katniss?" he says barely breathing "_I want you, **now**_" I demand and I keep kissing him, this time not his mouth but leaving soft, warm kisses all over his jawline and neck, he moans at this so I keep going assuming this makes him happy.

Clumsily I get rid of his shirt so I can see his well shaped chest and arms, I appreciate his beauty for a minute and then I keep kissing him, now going a bit lower than just his neck, I bite him in certain spots and he seems to like it.

Peeta's P.O.V.

Katniss's mouth all over my chest and neck feels magical, her hot, sweet kisses feel so good on me. I handle to take off her shirt and bra so I can feel her bare chest against me I pass my hands all over her nude back and she shivers, she faces me to give me a kiss then a knock on the door ruins everything.

"Do you have some food, sweethearts?" Haymitch's drunken voice is so recognizable, we decide to ignore him but he won't go "I'm coming in, I know you're home!" he mumbles and I hear his voice a lot nearer than the last time, just then we look at the door and the knob is moving.

"PEETA THE DOOR IS OPEN!" Katniss shouts.

*****things will be heating up more and more each chapter you'll see ;)

I have to improve my punctuation, I know, thanks so much for your reviews, I will do it on the next chapter I had no time to double check this one, sorry again!

Leave your reviews, please, may the odds be ever in your favor!


	3. My dandelion in the spring

**Peeta's P.O.V. **

Katniss gives me a concerned look then she jumps off of me and puts her clothes back on, leaving me there laying on the couch shirtless when Haymitch comes in.

"What are you doing? why are you half naked, boy?" he asks curiously and I see Katniss's face is red with shame, none of us answers so he forgets about that because the alcohol in his blood doesn't allow him to stay on his 5 senses for more than half a minute "do you have some food?" he mumbles as he drinks the last sip of alcohol that's left in his bottle. Katniss looks at me, waiting for me to say something to the drunk man standing on the hallway.

"S-sure.. huh.. we have some" I reply getting back on my feet to find my shirt and put it back on "Sit there, I'll be with you in a bit" I say pointing at the kitchen table, Haymitch sits there obedient while I walk towards Katniss and grab her by the waist "I'll take care of him, don't worry" she smiles "This is not over Mr. Mellark, not yet" she whispers seductively in my ear and leaves a peck on my lips before she leaves. What is she doing? I don't want her to do this just because she thinks that I need her to be a woman, I love Katniss just the way she is. I waited years for her to notice me, why wouldn't I wait for her to be ready for this? I've fantasized about us making sweet love, a lot more often than I should, I do want her and I couldn't think of any other woman in that way, her body is precious to me, I want to respect her, wait until she's fully ready to give herself to me, I want it to be special, I want us to make love not to have sex but what if Haymitch doesn't come to stop us next time? is she ready? I know I am and I know I want this but what about her?

"Boy! Food!" Haymitch demands

"Calm down buddy, I'm coming" I reply as I walk into the kitchen

"So, you and the girl on fire were literally on fire, huh?" he says raising both of his eyebrows.

I just smiled "she has this weird idea that she's too innocent for me and that I need a woman not an innocent kid" I explain "honestly, I'm happy with how things are right now, you know?" I say as I hand Haymitch some of the bread I made "and I know I'm ready for this and I want it, but I don't want her to do it just to show me she's a woman, I want her to do it because she loves me and because she wants to be all mine, you know what I mean?"

"Yes" Haymitch says with a sad pitch, I was not expecting this sort of answer from him, it's hard for me to imagine Haymitch loving someone else that's not his liqueur bottle, he notices that I'm amazed by his response "Yes, boy, I know me and Betty have been together for a long time now" he says pointing at his empty bottle "but there was someone besides her, there has always been but it's too painful for me to love her, cause she's not here so that's why I prefer Betty, there's no pain with her by my side" he jokes "well, only when she's full!" he laughs at his own joke while I stand there, still amazed by Haymitch's words, he loved someone but he lost her, I understand him, Katniss is with me but if something happens and for some reason I get to lose her, pain would be unbearable, every inch of my body would be in pain. I can assure you I'd be an alcoholic too.

"Well kid, enough about me and Betty, tell me, have you ever... you know" he says

".. been with a woman before, you mean?" I ask

"Yes, have you?"

"No." I answer honestly "any advice?"

He laughs "so you thought I'd give you advice on how to make love to a woman? Please kid, I'm a drunk lonely man, the only love I get is from my hand, if you know what I mean" he joked and we both laughed. I like being around Haymitch, he makes me laugh a lot, he's my friend.

Haymitch spent a couple hours with me on the kitchen then he decided to go home with Betty, to fill her up again and ease the pain that comes with sobriety.

**Katniss's P.O. V.**

Haymitch left, I just heard the door and now I listen to Peeta's noisy footsteps, I sit on the edge of the bed waiting for him to open the bedroom door and he does.

"Hey" he says blithe

"Hey" I reply with a smile on my face "come here" I tell him as I point at the spot next to me.

He walks on my direction and sits next to me, I grab his hand as I lift myself a bit to reach his cheek and leave a soft kiss on it.

"What's wrong?" he asks curious.

"Nothing's wrong" and I was being honest, I'm glad he's with me, I'm glad I chose him, he has always been what I needed, that selfless man with that huge golden heart, who has been able to love me even when I tore his heart apart into a million pieces, he's my dandelion in the spring. "I love you" I say and I hold his hand tighter.

"I love you too, more than you will ever get to know" he says smiley as he strokes my hair with his free hand then he leans towards me to kiss my forehead.

"Thank you" I tell him.

"What for?"

"For everything, for loving me, more than anything, I guess" I'm all he has and he has always been protecting me, it's time for me to look after him as much as he does for me, I will protect his heart like it's the most valuable thing I will ever own, because, after all, it is.

"Katniss, please, you don't have to-" I shut him up with a kiss, because I may not be good with words but I can give him my all with this kiss, so he will know that I appreciate and love him, more than anything and anyone.

**I'm so sorry this chapter is way too short, that's all I have, I'm dry! I will try to inspire me, I promise, next chapter will be HUGE. Sorry again for any mistake. Thanks for the reviews, I really appreciate it, may the odds be ever in your favor! **

**xx.**


	4. My Peeta

_**Sorry it took me so long to upload, I actually forgot I had a fanfic, I'm so sorry, and sorry again for my writing, or any mistake, I have no internet, so it was a little bit harder to write, sorry if I repeat some words too much!**_

**Katniss's P.O.V.**

Peeta, he's the last thing my eyes see before I go to sleep and then he's the first thing I look at in the morning, his golden curls glow as the sunbeams hit him right on that heavenly-made face of his causing Peeta to wake up and consequently looking at me with his blue eyes, so pure, so perfect. I hold his gaze for a second then a smile fills my face accompanied by a laugh

"What's so funny?" he asks curious

"Nothing, I'm just happy" I reply as I run my hand through his cheek

"Happy? I'd say crazy" he jokes

"Oh, thanks, I'll take that as a compliment" I say sarcastically then give him a peck on the lips, I love how the world seems to disappear the moment our lips touch.

"Such a good way to start the day!" he says with a grin, then he sits at the edge of the bed stretching out, I look at him mesmerized by his perfection, this is crazy, years ago, I would just look at him as the boy with the bread, now he's my entire world, everything he does is perfection to my eyes and I know I'm not the type of person who would go around being all cheesy and romantic, but this is the effect he has on me, he makes me happy, being with him eases the pain caused by all the things I've been through, I feel as if I was living in a nightmare but Peeta woke me up to get me out of it. I can't help but stare at him, he notices and turns around to face me

"What?" he speaks awkwardly

"Nothing" I tell him

"And here it is, another reason to think you're crazy" he says then he leans in for a kiss, this time not just a peck but a real kiss, he stops then looks at me directly on the eyes and I can see the heat in his eyes, he wants me. I look at him, as in giving him permission to make me his, he then gets on top of me holding me by the hips with one hand as the other holds my face he's kissing me with such passion and I feel like I'm being set on fire by his lips. Luckily he sleeps shirtless so that's something less to worry about. He keeps one hand on my hips as the other one goes from my face to take my t-shirt and bra off, I moan a lightly as I feel his well-shaped chest in touch with my breasts, it turned me on, even more.

**Peeta's P.O.V.**

Katniss lets a barely audible moan escapes, that drove me crazy, now let the games begin. I proceed to kiss her neck softly then I go a bit lower, licking her breasts as my tongue plays with her nipples, she bites her lip, I know she's enjoying it and I am too, a few minutes after, I decide to move forward, I leave a hot trace of kisses down her stomach until I reach her pants, I look up at her "Are you sure?"

"Don't stop" she says helping me to strip her off until she's completely naked, her beautiful body, so precious and perfect, I love it even with those scars she hates so much, I think they're perfect, just as she is.

I'm not an expert at this stuff, but I think I know what to do, I open Katniss' legs then I look back at her, she looks at me blushed and curious as well, not knowing what I'm going to do, holding the gaze, I touch her, he leans her head back in pleasure and a moan scape her mouth, I know I'm on the right track, I continue then I decide to use my tongue, I lick her and she moans higher this time I assume this feels way better, I lick her up and down, left to right, in and out, biting her softly, her breathing is getting faster and her hands are clutched in the sheets, her eyes closed and her moans are uncontrollably loud. I keep going, I get harder as well, listening to her makes me feel as if I'm on fire, it gives me pleasure, so I keep going until she gives one last loud moan.

She opens her eyes and her body relaxes, she's still biting her lip an her breathing is as if she just ran a mile.

"Oh Peeta..." she says barely breathing

"Well I tried my best" I replied getting back on top of her and kissing her on the lips, she bites my lower lip and the taste of blood in my mouth, for some reason is not disgusting.

"Now's your turn" She rolls us over so she's not on top of me.

She accidentally strokes my manhood with her leg and I groan, she looks a bit confused but I think that gave her a clue on what to do. She takes my pants off then my boxers releasing my hardness. Kantniss kisses me all the way down from my jawline until she reaches the spot. She takes me on her hands and starts stroking me up and down, I moan and tilt my head back.

**Katniss's P.O.V.**

Peeta's enjoying this, so I won't stop, instead of using both of my hands I use only one now, stroking his –must say big—manhood, my grip becomes tighter because I notice the tighter the better, I go faster, then I go slow then I go faster again and then I decide to involve my mouth into this, I lick his tip, shortness of breath, heart beating faster, he likes this. I then proceed to put the entire thing on my mouth, having a hard time to make it fit and it doesn't, doesn't matter I can work with that, I suck his manhood, hard and fast, his eyes are tightly closed and he groans so loud I bet Haymitch can listen to him, if he's sober enough. I don't stop, I suck on his manhood faster and faster then I play with my tongue on the tip and give it a soft bite, I keep doing this until a white, thick, sticky substance came out of him, it's all over me, from my hair to my stomach, he seems ashamed.

"I'm so-orry" he says still short of breath

"I don't mind" I say and I really don't this is new and for some reason it is not bad nor disgusting. I get on top of him rubbing me against his manhood, it feels good, for both of us. He gets on top of me.

"Are you sure about this, Kantniss?" He asks politely

"Yes, I want you, you want me, I love you and you love me too" I reply firmly "Now get in" I say teasing him

He grins then he kisses me on the neck as he slowly makes his way inside me. It hurts but the pain is quickly replaced by pleasure, I ask him to go slow. Our bodies seem to match perfectly. After a few times of him going in and out of me I ask him to go faster, there's now no pain left, pleasure took its place.

We kiss fiercely and as we do we shut down each other's moans , we go faster, we keep kissing, then go slow and kiss some more, until we collapse drowned by lust and delight.

We lie next to each other, I'm wrapped by Peeta's arms, my head cradled on his chest.

I'm his, in every single way possible. And he's mine, he's _my Peeta_.

I fall asleep in his arms, _no one else's arms have made me feel this safe._ And no one else's arms will.

_*****First time I write a sex scene lol so sorry if it's too explicit, I tried so so so hard, leave your reviews! Tell me what you think!_

_******chapter 5 coming soon ;)_

**_May the odds be ever in your favor!_**


	5. Heffie

_**Peeta's P.O.V. **_

The warm water all over my naked body feels good, not as good as Katniss' hands but is something I enjoy. Last night was unforgettable, every thought of Katniss being innocent is now gone, by far. We not only had sex, we made love to each other, her breathtaking body is now all mine and I am hers, in every way.

I get out of the shower wrapping a towel around my waist and enter our room, _our room_, it now makes more sense, before, it was only a room with a bed to sleep in, it had no meaning but now this bed has something special on it, two novice lovers loved each other 'til ecstasy, creating a new kind of bond, making our love grow, as crazy as that sounds, because I never thought I could love her more than I already did, but I do.

"Peeta" Katniss shouts from the 1st floor "are you ready? We need to get this done before Haymitch gets too drunk, which won't take long!"

Today's Haymitch's birthday so I'm gonna go to the bakery to make him a cake and to bake some cheese buns, Katniss's been craving some of these for more than a week so I thought I'd surprise her.

After I get dressed we make our way to the bakery, once in there I say Hi to Susan and Collin, these two work with me. Since mom and Dad passed away I inherited the bakery, when I came back to 12 I tried to run the business alone but it was too much for one man, even for me, so that's when I decided to hire them, they're great people, Susan is a young woman from district 13, big brown eyes, thin and short, light skin, and long black hair while Collin is this plump, tall guy, curly brown hair and green eyes, also from district 13, they're really nice people and I like them.

"Wasn't this supposed to be your day off, Peeta?" asks Susan gently

"Yeah, but today's Haymitch's birthday I just came here to make him birthday cake" I reply as I grab a mixing bowl for the batter and start to put in the ingredients

"You better pour in a bottle of liqueur in there" jokes Collin

"Collin's right, I don't think Haymitch will even consider to touch that cake if it can´t get him drunk" says Katniss and we all burst out laughing

Katniss is at the front of the bakery chitchatting with Susan, she doesn't like people, but I can tell she's really trying to have a good relationship with Susan and Collin, after all they're the closest thing we have to friends, after birthday boy and old Greasy Sae.

Collin finishes the cheese buns and I finish the cake, then we both put the stuff in the oven, all we have to do now, is to wait.

After about half an hour, the smell of bread starts to fill the bakery, we take the cake and cheese buns out of the oven for them to cool a bit, Katniss smells the cheese buns and comes running into the back of the bakery, where we keep the ovens.

"Are those-"

"Yes, just for you" I speak before she can even finish the sentence then I kiss her on the forehead.

"Thank you Mr. Mellark" She says imitating the voice of the children when they thank me for giving them cookies every Friday after school "give me those" Katniss says, taking two of the buns, even though they're still too hot to eat.

"Don't burn yourself girl on fire!" I say, in a sort of soft scold.

The cake's cool enough for me to start icing, I do it while Susan, Katniss and Collin are sitting at the counter eating the buns. After covering the cake with a layer of white icing I think it'd be a good idea to write something on top of it like "Happy Birthday" or something like that, as I was standing there thinking, I feel Katniss' arms around me

"Hey" I say

"Hi, again" she laughs "what are you going to write on top of the cake?" she asks curious

"I don't know, what should I write?"

"Let me do it" she's not much of a baker but she starts to write on the cake

"-_Happy Birthday, sweetheart! Stay alive_- that's a good one" I say to Katniss and I laugh

"Now let's go, we don't want Haymitch to pass out before the cake, do we?"

"No, we don't " I reply as I wrap the cake and then we go to Haymitch's house.

_**Katniss' P.O.V.**_

We took the bother to knock on the door, knowing it would be useless cause Haymitch's door's always open, besides he's way too lazy – or drunk- to get up and open up. So we just let us in into his house, which seems strangely clean, as we make our way through the entrance hallway, the sound of her, still capitalized, voice fills the room. Effie's back.

"Well! Hello you two!" she says giving us a big squeeze. I always liked Effie, at first she was annoying, but then I started to understand her, she was born and raised in the capitol, she's not like us but that doesn't make her a bad person, she is good, I know that.

After the long hug Peeta puts the cake on the table and goes to find Haymitch, leaving me alone with Effie, whose hair is no longer pink, she has brown hair now, still with a big up-do but her clothes were definitely simpler, she's changed, but I know she's still the same.

"So.. Effie, such a surprise to find you here on Haymitch's birthday, I didn't know you were coming" I say, as a lot of reasons for Effie's surprise visit run through my mind at the moment.

"W-well" she starts off nervously "Erm.. you know, just wanted to make a quick visit, to see Haymitch" her eyes sort of light up at the mention of our mentor's name "and of course to see you and Peeta, I've missed you, whether you believe it or not!" she jokes and I laugh weakly

"You came all the way from the capitol to see Haymitch?" I tease

"Oh Katniss, don't be silly, I came here to see you as well" she answers but for some reason I don't believe her.

Is it even possible? Haymitch and Effie? How? And most importantly, _when?_ As far as I know this is the first time Effie's been here in years also Haymitch's always too drunk to notice about anything, _how? The question will remain unanswered._

"Hey everyone, here's the birthday boy!" Peeta announces Haymitch's entrance triumphant.

We spend a good time with Effie and Haymitch, we eat some cake, some chitchat here and there, everything's good it eventually gets late so Peeta and I decide it's time to leave, to go home.

"Are you staying?" I ask Effie

"Yes, I'm staying, you two lovelies go home, I'll go visit tomorrow" she says gently

"Are you staying here? with Haymitch?" Peeta asks pertly, I give him a nudge

"Peeta, we have to go, see you guys tomorrow!" I tell them immediately and take Peeta by the arm and leave.

Once we're home we put on our night clothes and cuddle up in bed, as we do every night.

"Haymitch and Effie, can you believe it?" He says

"I know, it's weird, but if they're happy we should let them be, right?" I answer

"I'm so curious, I can't wait to ask Haymitch what the hell is going on!" he laughs at the idea of them being a couple "I just can't picture it" he says, still laughing.

"Oh, come on, give them a rest, Mellark, go to sleep" I speak, jokingly scolding him.

He kisses me goodnight and then I doze off wrapped by his arms. As always.

**_*Hope you like my fanfic, my first one btw._**

**_May the odds be ever in your favor!_**


	6. Forgiveness

I wake up early in the morning for some reason with the strange urge to go to the woods, as if I knew something was going to happen, so I do. I got dressed, kissed Peeta on the cheek trying no to wake him up then I wrote down a note for him "I'm hunting, I'll be back soon, I love you. " and I left the house.

On my way to the woods I saw Effie walking towards Haymitch's place with a brown paper bag full of food, I guess we were right, _they are together_, whether in a romantic way or just as friends but they are. She looks nervously at me knowing I would ask her about her and Haymitch, and I was going to, but I decided to leave her alone, it's fine if they're or not together, is not of my business anyway, so I just smiled at her and she smiled back as we, each, went our own way.

Once in the woods I sat there in the place where Gale and I used to meet, all the memories started to pop up in my head and I couldn't help but smile. He was my best friend and I miss him but Prim's gone because of him even if he never meant to hurt her… or _me_. But he did and I did too, that's why he left, I chose Peeta over him and he killed my sister because his thirst to take the capitol down took over him, he was blind. We went from being best friends to being complete strangers.

If I could go back in time and change everything, Prim's name not being called at the reaping, me not volunteering... me and Peeta... No, that's the only reason I wouldn't change things, because of Peeta. You know how they say that after something bad happens to you something good comes out of it, well it's true.

I feel tears rolling down my cheek and I let them do it, I miss Gale and Prim, I love Peeta, why can't I have them all? I am happy I won't say I am not, Peeta makes my life worth living, but everything would be so much better if they were all with me.

as I wipe my tears with my right hand I feel a hand on my shoulder I stand up quickly and startled then I turn back to face the hand's owner, and there he is.

"Hey Catnip" Gale's strong voice echoed inside my head and my heart started to beat faster when our eyes met "He told me you were here and I decided to come but if you want I can g-"

"Don't" I say, maybe I didn't mean to but I said it and deep down I knew I wanted him to stay, to be my best friend again. I take a step towards him, we're close enough to touch and suddenly my arms embrace him tightly and tears start to fall out again, this time uncontrollably, with my head sunk in his chest, Gale is back.

"Wow, I wasn't expecting this, Catnip" He speaks jokingly as he hugs me back, wrapping me with his long, strong arms, I feel safer, I have Peeta and now I have Gale too, at least for this moment...

Scenes of Prim's death mixed with Gale's face appear in my head, making it hard to breathe, I let go of Gale, I'm paralyzed by the idea of being hold by my sister's killer who is, at the same time, my best friend. I walk away with a horrified look on my face and I see Gale's expression, full of pain and regret.

"I'm sorry Katniss!" he punches a nearby tree as he screams the phrase with a painful pitch "I never meant to hurt Prim, or hurt you, you know that was not what I wanted and I- I-" he's unable to finish the sentence because tears start to stream down his face accompanied by loud sobs "Please..." and he breaks, he's kneeled on the ground with his hands on his face, crying.

I don't know what to feel, I just stand there, watching him cry his heart out, pleading for forgiveness, pleading for his best friend to come back.

I stand there for about a minute, until I decide to move, I walk to where Gale's kneeled and I put my nad on his back, he looks at me with his red, puffy eyes and I take my free hand to his face.

"Stop, Gale" I kneel next to him and I hold him with one hand while the other moves from his face to his hand "Don't do this to me, you're my best friend but at the same time you..."

"I killed your sister" it sounded so cold and hollow "I know, that haunts me every damn day, Katniss!" he speaks with anger towards his actions "I lost you, not only as a lover but as my best friend too... I lost you in every way I could've lost you, do you understand that?"

"Yes, I lost my best friend too but is not that easy, it is.. it was my sister!" I say desperately

"Please.." he begs

"Gale... I miss you, I miss my best friend but..." I couldn't finish

"I know what I did, Katniss, I know, I know, I know... but I'm here pleading for forgiveness because I need you, I miss you and because I can't let go of us, please… at least try to forgive me for killing Prim" that last sentence echoed in my head like a broken record, forgiving him for killing Prim, tiny little Prim, my sister.

Whenever I try to let go of her death Gale comes into my mind and it fills me with anger and pain, my best friend killed my sister, how sick is that? I miss him so much, but what he did... I am starting to feel dizzy, so many thoughts running around in my head, this is too much for me to handle.

Is not that I don't want to forgive him, I feel guilty, giving Gale my forgiveness I let go of Prim, it makes me feel like I never cared for her, that I never loved her that much, that I'm capable of letting go of her just to get back my best friend, just because I miss him, just because he makes _me _happy. Selfish, that's what I am if I forgive Gale.

"I have to go, Gale, I can't do this, not right now" I slowly get up and walk away

"Katniss, please, I don't want to lose you, not again" he said painfully and honestly I don't want to lose him, not again.

***I didn't double check this one, and the one before this one.. yeah sorry about that, sorry again for any mistake! I get inspired then I run dry so that's why I upload so irregularly, so sorry for everything, including my poor vocabulary and my short chapters, leave your reviews please!**

** have a nice day and may the odd be ever in your favor! **


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